Work was flying by when i got a text from this dude who I know that runs (or attempts to run). His name is Michael "Iron Mike" McCarty. Iron Mike thinks he is so cool because he coaches and stuff but he really isn't. I mean how "cool" can you be when your best marathon time is north of 2:30 and you can't even break 1:10 for a half. either way, i run with this guy sometimes because it provides me with someone to talk to every two weeks. You see, my mom told me, that in order to truly experience life, you should have a conversation with someone at least once every two weeks. So for this fortnight, i guess iron mike will do.
We met at this park which has a near 8-mile loop. The goal was to run two of these loops at a 3:30/km clip which only age grades to around 76% or something. I know, its nothing fast, but it was Iron Mike's idea. Iron Mike showed up around 2 minutes and 10 seconds late which really annoyed me. He apologized and said something about stopping along the way to pick up a stranded old lady (probably slow) and take her to a place where she could warm up and make a phone call. he said he stayed there to make sure she was able to get a hold of somebody, but i think that iron mike really stayed there so he could be two minutes late and be a total jerk. What an ass.
The run FINALLY started and we hit a good 3:15 clip which albeit quicker than my goal average still worked out because runners should always start fast and then move their pace down as they go along. Iron mike was telling me that he volunteers at some red cross station and they needed volunteers. All i heard was "I am a jerk and i am selfish" blah, blah, blah. Why do i even run with this guy? Well we continued down the path until we saw two people walking on the side. I yelled "TRACK" "TRACK" and the jerks moved to the side.. MY SIDE. I ran into one of them but luckily was able to push myself away and maintain my balance. I think the other walker was tired because they decided to take a lil nap/pow wow on the snowy ground. Lazy slow people... must suck to be them. I wonder what its like? Iron Mike told me that what i did was rude and that he would not run with me if i kept behaving like that. I told him that it was the rudest thing to ever say to me. I mean what is his deal? He is yelling at me for training. Those walkers know who i am and my goal of making the olympics. SO i decided that i was gonna race Iron mike and then ditch him and complete the run on my own.
Quickly i told him that we were going to race to the next tree which was about 0.70 kilometers away. And then i said "GO" and sprinted away. Iron Mike was sooo slow that i had gained 100 meters on him in like a minute. I decided i liked this pace so i kept going. I think he knew how fast and awesome i was now that i totally wasted him in this race. I continued the run at a 3:20/km clip and finally got to my car. It was an ok work out and i think i age graded at 75% so we'll count that as a recovery run because we all know that i normally run at a 80% age grade or better.
I got back to my car and put on some Beebs when Iron Mike walked up to my car and looked very mad. He asked why i decided to sprint away. I told him that we were racing and that he was unable to keep up with me because i am better than him. He said that we were only doing a moderate tempo run and that we never actually raced. I guess that's loser talk. He lost the race and he knew it. I told him that winners win and thats all we do. He can go back to his loser soup kitchen where he volunteers at on wednesdays and just hang out with his jerk self. I told him that i have the heart of a champion and i don't back down. He said that if i really wanted to race, then its on at the March Madness Half Marathon in Cary, IL (03/27/2011).
Boom. And just like that we have our first scheduled race. On the drive home, i thought about how selfish Iron Mike was and how much of a jerk he was for telling me I was in the wrong with the SLOW people. SLOW people don't count. Their only job is to give me water and move out of the way when i yell "TRACK" I was very discontented until I heard on the radio that a new Justin Bieber movie was coming out soon. Apparently it is titled "Never Say Never" and it was filmed in 3D and comes out February 11, 2011. OMG! This was it! I had an epiphany. My new motto for the season will be "NEVER SAY NEVER" just like the Biebs. Through the power of Justin Bieber, I will qualify for Olympic Trials and there i will kick that jerk Ryan Hall's ass and from there I will win the gold medal at the 2012 Olympics for Team USA! I am now happy again!
No comments:
Post a Comment