Work was flying by when i got a text from this dude who I know that runs (or attempts to run). His name is Michael "Iron Mike" McCarty. Iron Mike thinks he is so cool because he coaches and stuff but he really isn't. I mean how "cool" can you be when your best marathon time is north of 2:30 and you can't even break 1:10 for a half. either way, i run with this guy sometimes because it provides me with someone to talk to every two weeks. You see, my mom told me, that in order to truly experience life, you should have a conversation with someone at least once every two weeks. So for this fortnight, i guess iron mike will do.
We met at this park which has a near 8-mile loop. The goal was to run two of these loops at a 3:30/km clip which only age grades to around 76% or something. I know, its nothing fast, but it was Iron Mike's idea. Iron Mike showed up around 2 minutes and 10 seconds late which really annoyed me. He apologized and said something about stopping along the way to pick up a stranded old lady (probably slow) and take her to a place where she could warm up and make a phone call. he said he stayed there to make sure she was able to get a hold of somebody, but i think that iron mike really stayed there so he could be two minutes late and be a total jerk. What an ass.
The run FINALLY started and we hit a good 3:15 clip which albeit quicker than my goal average still worked out because runners should always start fast and then move their pace down as they go along. Iron mike was telling me that he volunteers at some red cross station and they needed volunteers. All i heard was "I am a jerk and i am selfish" blah, blah, blah. Why do i even run with this guy? Well we continued down the path until we saw two people walking on the side. I yelled "TRACK" "TRACK" and the jerks moved to the side.. MY SIDE. I ran into one of them but luckily was able to push myself away and maintain my balance. I think the other walker was tired because they decided to take a lil nap/pow wow on the snowy ground. Lazy slow people... must suck to be them. I wonder what its like? Iron Mike told me that what i did was rude and that he would not run with me if i kept behaving like that. I told him that it was the rudest thing to ever say to me. I mean what is his deal? He is yelling at me for training. Those walkers know who i am and my goal of making the olympics. SO i decided that i was gonna race Iron mike and then ditch him and complete the run on my own.
Quickly i told him that we were going to race to the next tree which was about 0.70 kilometers away. And then i said "GO" and sprinted away. Iron Mike was sooo slow that i had gained 100 meters on him in like a minute. I decided i liked this pace so i kept going. I think he knew how fast and awesome i was now that i totally wasted him in this race. I continued the run at a 3:20/km clip and finally got to my car. It was an ok work out and i think i age graded at 75% so we'll count that as a recovery run because we all know that i normally run at a 80% age grade or better.
I got back to my car and put on some Beebs when Iron Mike walked up to my car and looked very mad. He asked why i decided to sprint away. I told him that we were racing and that he was unable to keep up with me because i am better than him. He said that we were only doing a moderate tempo run and that we never actually raced. I guess that's loser talk. He lost the race and he knew it. I told him that winners win and thats all we do. He can go back to his loser soup kitchen where he volunteers at on wednesdays and just hang out with his jerk self. I told him that i have the heart of a champion and i don't back down. He said that if i really wanted to race, then its on at the March Madness Half Marathon in Cary, IL (03/27/2011).
Boom. And just like that we have our first scheduled race. On the drive home, i thought about how selfish Iron Mike was and how much of a jerk he was for telling me I was in the wrong with the SLOW people. SLOW people don't count. Their only job is to give me water and move out of the way when i yell "TRACK" I was very discontented until I heard on the radio that a new Justin Bieber movie was coming out soon. Apparently it is titled "Never Say Never" and it was filmed in 3D and comes out February 11, 2011. OMG! This was it! I had an epiphany. My new motto for the season will be "NEVER SAY NEVER" just like the Biebs. Through the power of Justin Bieber, I will qualify for Olympic Trials and there i will kick that jerk Ryan Hall's ass and from there I will win the gold medal at the 2012 Olympics for Team USA! I am now happy again!
Monday, January 31, 2011
Day Five: The heart of a Champion
What a day today! Woke up late today, i felt like a slacker as i got out of bed and my alarm clock read 4:42 AM. I mean, what kind of champion wakes up after 4:30 AM, especially the day after a recovery run. For some reason i was still sore, but no matter, I was ready to take on the day.
Since 4:30 AM is going to be my new wake up time, i decided to jump start the morning with some fresh new Bieber, or Biebs, as I call him. I started playing "Baby" from my computer stereo as i was getting ready when there was a knock on my door. It was my neighbor and he looked tired. I told him that he should get some sleep because of his tiredness and turned around to do one of my sweet dance moves as a warm-up. I think he wanted to show me a new dance move too because he kept moving his arms and hands towards my neck like he was trying to spin me. However, i was in no mood to dance so i just moved him towards the door and shut it and continued on my merry preparation. I should mention though that i decided to pick up a new running bag where i can carry all my gels and stuff. I think its pretty awesome.
Anyways, today's AM run called for a 2 X 3 X 3 which is 2 KM medium followed by 3 KM at slightly harder pace followed by a 2 KM at a 76% age graded pace. I was heading out the door when i saw a police car in the parking lot. Apparently some guy was playing party music in the building. I told the officer that the only person i knew who was awake too was my neighbor. I told him that my neighbor didn't seemed to have gotten much sleep so it must have been him. The police man said he was going to talk with him. I hope they can help him get to sleep. The police must do that, after all, they are here to serve and protect.
The run started out good, albeit very cold. I was hitting the streets at a good 3:24/Kilometer clip which was ok for the first 2 kilometers. I decided to switch to kilometers because I heard Steve Prefontaine used to train in kilometers and since I am faster than him right now I didn't want his training to be even remotely better than mine. Things were going smoothly until what appeared to be a mouse got in my way. It was HUGE and caused me to sprint out of the way. Unfortunately, i sprinted into a telephone pole and was now on the ground... Someone must have been drinking Kool Aid because the snow down there was red.. But then i noticed that when i got up, the red kept coming.. OMG! I have a bloody nose! I immediately headed back in quick manner. The first KM home was run at a 3:10 followed by the second one at 3:02. When i got home, my nose was no longer bleeding and the police were gone.. Overall, i ran 4 KM in 13:00 which is pretty pathetic. If I'm gonna run like a champion, i am going to have to stay away from telephone poles. I immediately went through MAPQUEST for the next two hours to identify where all of the telephone poles were in my running routes to avoid running into them in the future.
I didn't realize that doing so took so long as by the time i finished it was 8:00 and i was supposed to be at work at 8:30. Oh crap.. I hope my boss understands that by identifying telephone poles I am really helping America who needs me to win the Olympics. I will break out my evening run in the next post.
Since 4:30 AM is going to be my new wake up time, i decided to jump start the morning with some fresh new Bieber, or Biebs, as I call him. I started playing "Baby" from my computer stereo as i was getting ready when there was a knock on my door. It was my neighbor and he looked tired. I told him that he should get some sleep because of his tiredness and turned around to do one of my sweet dance moves as a warm-up. I think he wanted to show me a new dance move too because he kept moving his arms and hands towards my neck like he was trying to spin me. However, i was in no mood to dance so i just moved him towards the door and shut it and continued on my merry preparation. I should mention though that i decided to pick up a new running bag where i can carry all my gels and stuff. I think its pretty awesome.
The run started out good, albeit very cold. I was hitting the streets at a good 3:24/Kilometer clip which was ok for the first 2 kilometers. I decided to switch to kilometers because I heard Steve Prefontaine used to train in kilometers and since I am faster than him right now I didn't want his training to be even remotely better than mine. Things were going smoothly until what appeared to be a mouse got in my way. It was HUGE and caused me to sprint out of the way. Unfortunately, i sprinted into a telephone pole and was now on the ground... Someone must have been drinking Kool Aid because the snow down there was red.. But then i noticed that when i got up, the red kept coming.. OMG! I have a bloody nose! I immediately headed back in quick manner. The first KM home was run at a 3:10 followed by the second one at 3:02. When i got home, my nose was no longer bleeding and the police were gone.. Overall, i ran 4 KM in 13:00 which is pretty pathetic. If I'm gonna run like a champion, i am going to have to stay away from telephone poles. I immediately went through MAPQUEST for the next two hours to identify where all of the telephone poles were in my running routes to avoid running into them in the future.
I didn't realize that doing so took so long as by the time i finished it was 8:00 and i was supposed to be at work at 8:30. Oh crap.. I hope my boss understands that by identifying telephone poles I am really helping America who needs me to win the Olympics. I will break out my evening run in the next post.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Day Four: Born to Run?
So i am not what you would call a "reader", but i picked up and read the entire first chapter of the hit book "Born to Run"
I must say.. it was the most provacative 30 pages I've ever read in my life since the time i read the cliffnotes to "Of Mice and Men" in the eighth grade. I always thought that running barefoot was what slow people did so that they could have an excuse for being slow.. but this book has inspired me to run barefoot starting with today's 20-mile recovery run.
Before i went out on the run, i called my ole coach for some advice. As mentioned before, he is quite the jokester.. when i called, he answered with a "how did you get my number?" hahaha. he is like the Dane Cook of answering phones (my favorite comedian of all time). Well i mentioned the barefoot thing to him, and he said that beginning to run barefoot, in chicago, in january was not wise and that 20-miles for a recovery run was probably overdoing it. i told him that his job was to just say yes and that i really enjoyed his olympic marathon performance.. oh wait, he never ran the marathon in the olympics. To which he hung up on me after telling me to never call him again. well, i guess i will have to coach myself from now on.
The Run
Being that it was 35 degrees today, i figured that all i needed were my compression shorts, a long sleeved bon jovi shirt, winter hat and gloves. Notice how i didn't say socks and shoes. hahaha. Its official, i will now become the greatest runner in the world because i no longer need shoes. Typically i put in 2,000 miles in a pair of shoes before buying a new pair. i know that is not a lot, but i've only had ten stress fractures in the past two years so my numbers speak for themselves and justify my training philosophy.
Now since this was a recovery run, i wanted to keep it at an age grade of 71.7% (which is at a slow clip of 6:30 miles). I have now picked up a new training measure, where i am going to age grade all of my runs. I figure that if i can't train at a minimum age grade of 71.7% (my fifth favorite number) then i need to move to des moines, iowa and have a sex change operation for sucking so bad at running. I stepped out my door and began the easy recovery run at the 6:30 clip. The first few seconds felt awesome, but then i began to notice how uncomfortable it was to run on snow, water and ice with your bare feet. I also learned that people (mean people) throw salt on the ground in attempts to prevent fast people from running faster... but since i was "born to run", i decided to man up and just do it. The first five miles were kind of cool as i think word got out that i was training. It was evident as people were honking their horns at me and yelling words of encouragement as i ran down Illinois Route 20 onto Interstate 290 East. The fact that cars seemed to be flying past me in the left lane inspired me to run faster. Around mile ten i decided to turn around and make it a there and back. By this point, my feet were feeling raw and i noticed some blood. Well, being the winner i am i kept running. However, at mile 12 my body felt like it was in absolute pain and my breathing was disorderly. How could this be? This was my only recover run scheduled for the month and i was running at a pedestrian 6:30 clip. Well i looked at my watch and felt like a pussy. My garmin showed me that i was really at a 6:32 clip. This was really discouraging and distracting.. So distracting in fact, that i tripped over a homeless man and fell into the median. As i got up, the homeless guy yelled at me a little and then asked for one dollar. I told him that Obama was in office now and that his money was no good here. He started chasing me so i picked up the clip and continued running. Finally, got back home and finished the run. It was shocking.... my overall time for the recovery run was 2:15:07 which was a 69% age grade. I was very disappointed in myself. I blamed the homeless man. How can i be an Olympic runner if i can't recover at a 70% age grade? Then i remembered that i ate a taco on Thursday night with my buddy Tim and that must have been it. Tim is a cool dude but he sure is awful slow. I think his best 5k time is like a 16:13 or something slow like that.... but he tries and i know my being fast inspires him to try to be less-SLOW.
So overall, today was a complete failure. I was unable to do the recovery run at a respectable age grade. I also noticed that my body was tired and sore.... but that must have been from the prior days of training because it most certainly was not the result of a recovery run. well anyways, i am going to take a break for rest of the day and start setting up my race schedule (will be posted soon)... But here is a picture of my foot to give you an idea of how injured it became.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Day Three: Getting in the Groove
Have you ever had one of those days when things just don't go your way? First of all, i had scheduled myself a gym workout at 5:00 AM followed by a run followed by another gym workout followed by a second run followed by a final gym workout followed by a final run of the night. However, I got to my gym at 5:00 AM and it turns out they don't even open that early. So I stood outside of the door from 4:45 AM until 6:30 AM waiting for the jerks to open the place up! Ugh! Do you know how cold it is in the Chicago area in late January? It is especially cold when you have nothing on but a pair of Saucony Tri Shorts and my favorite workout shirt.
Well needless to say i let the manager have an earful as that is totally bad customer service to keep your best client waiting until your little gym can open up. Anyways, i will write a letter to the president of Ballys and i will have the last laugh. But onto the workout, As you may be aware, i have what some would call the most perfect and beautiful body in the world. I am not that vain but its just a fact that I look absolutely flawless and every girl in the world wants to be with me. To maintain the body of Adonis, I have a strict set of workouts i do. First, I begin by doing 3,000 ab crunchers on the ab cruncher machine (3 sets X 1,000). On occasion, some people will actually watch me perform these exercises. Usually around 6 PM on a weekday. They will walk up to the machine while i am using it.. they will look at me exercise, then look at the clock then look at me exercise again. i think they must be timing me or something. I don't know why they try, it only takes me 60 minutes to complete this portion of the workout.
Well needless to say i let the manager have an earful as that is totally bad customer service to keep your best client waiting until your little gym can open up. Anyways, i will write a letter to the president of Ballys and i will have the last laugh. But onto the workout, As you may be aware, i have what some would call the most perfect and beautiful body in the world. I am not that vain but its just a fact that I look absolutely flawless and every girl in the world wants to be with me. To maintain the body of Adonis, I have a strict set of workouts i do. First, I begin by doing 3,000 ab crunchers on the ab cruncher machine (3 sets X 1,000). On occasion, some people will actually watch me perform these exercises. Usually around 6 PM on a weekday. They will walk up to the machine while i am using it.. they will look at me exercise, then look at the clock then look at me exercise again. i think they must be timing me or something. I don't know why they try, it only takes me 60 minutes to complete this portion of the workout.
The next phase of the workout consists of stretching. I am not saying that stretching works for SLOW people, but for those of us who actually "RUN" it helps make each run that much smoother.. like smooth jazz at Starbucks (my fave). After i am stretched, i take to the weight lifting portion of the workout. Now if you want to get mean and lean, the best thing to do is to lift as much weight as possible. Today was chest day. I went to the bench press and i put two 45-lb weights on each side of the bar. For those of you at home doing the math, that is 222 pounds on the metric scale. I usually do like 20 sets of 1 rep. Because i don't need man boobs. If you want smaller pecs but strong pecs, usually doing sets of 1 rep will help out. I got through 10 sets just fine when on the 11th set the bar just didn't seem to lift up from my chest. I think it was because of the air, it seemed pretty heavy in the gym today. I lifted this weight ten times before, its not like i couldn't do it an eleventh time. Well anyways, after ten minutes i yelled "TRACK" and someone finally came. I told him i got it but the jerk decided to lift the weight off my chest and put it back on the rack. What an asshole, he just wanted to steal my glory. I shared this information with him and he said that he was sorry and that he really liked my shorts. Well, after all of this wasted time on the bench, i decided that i had enough weight lifting for the day.
THE RUN
Today is what i like to call a 5 X 2 X 5 X 9 X 10% X 9 X 2 X 3.5 X 10 X 20% X 2 X 4 X 6 run. It is probably the least complicated run to do but it requires a treadmill. Luckily for me, my treadmill was available. I wanted to start off at an easy pace so i put the treadmill at 11.5 MPH and just leisurely jogged for five minutes. I was feeling good so i turned it up to 12.0 MPH for the next 2 seconds. After that i moved it back down to 11.5 MPH for five more minutes. At this point, i think something was wrong because i was experiencing that upper respiratory problem i had the day before which caused my breathing to go out of control. Lucky for me it was time for phase four of the work out where i set the treadmill to a pedestrian 10.0 MPH and run backwards for 9 minutes.. this was going great until i think some sweat dripped from my compression shorts and fell onto the track which caused me to fall backwards onto the machine. I hit my head on the machine and fell right onto the belt which propelled me into the treadmill behind me. The SLOW runner on there fell off her treadmill and landed into the treadmill behind her which caused that SLOW runner to fall. All in all, the three of us fell from the treadmill because of an act of GOD. I proceeded to get up and continue my workout. The SLOW runners seemed to be taking a break as they were just laying on the ground like a bunch of lazy bums. Haha. i guess that is why they aren't going to the olympics. Well the next phase of the run was to put the treadmill at 12.0 MPH at a 10% grade incline for 9 seconds. After that i switched back down to 9.0 MPH for two minutes. The fall was starting to get to me as i had a huge headache. I decided to just hurry up and finish the run so i put it at 9.3 mph and just ran for 12 more minutes. Overall, i was able to log in 6.33 miles.
When i left the gym i saw that two ambulance vehicles had arrived and some paramedics were heading in. I think its cool that paramedics work out too. I was going to ask them what types of exercises they do but then they would probably be in so much awe of me that it would put them in an awkward position and i don't want to come off as cocky in any way. Well i looked back into the gym and saw that the paramedics were talking to the ladies who also fell off the treadmill... maybe they went to school together. But anyways, i got into my 1996 purple Saturn with green doors and headed home. Now i know its a very common vehicle, but i knew it was mine because MINE has over 30 "26.2" bumper stickers on it. I love those stickers. They speak to the world and let them know that hey, the person in this car runs marathons and is much more important than you.
But i digress. Tonight is gonna be fun as i am meeting some friends at the bar. Now i don't plan on drinking and i'll probably only stay for 30 minutes but going to the bar is the most fun i ever have. My friends seem to understand as they know that i am always training and am FAST. and FAST people don't stay out late (like past 5:45 PM) and socialize with slow people. I think that is how i stay fast. You see, if you talk to slow people for too long, they start to spread their slow germs/disease to you and you'll really notice it in your workouts. I think that is how God made us. Some people suffer from the slow disease while others, like myself, thrive on being fast. well anyways, i am already looking forward to tomorrows workout.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Day Two, Part Two
Well, what a day at work. I was around 10 minutes late getting there and then my boss had the audacity to yell at me for it. I explained to him that i am a fast runner and due to my commitment to training to win the olympics, i will need worktime flexibility. He said that he could provide me 24/7 worktime flexibility if i kept this up. I said that i would think about it and that i appreciated his cooperation in the matter. What a great guy! I mean, he is willing to let me train all day every day for the sake of representing our country. Its not like that pussy Ryan Hall or something is even remotely gonna finish close to me at the trials. I hear that he that he totally wussed out of the Chicago Marathon. What a wimp! i am glad i am not like that... he deserves to be with slow people.
Anyways, after work i decided to call my old track coach Mike Smith and get his thoughts on my morning run.. He said that maybe i went too aggressive in the first mile. What a kidder, he is always so funny! I told him that i ran in the low 4:20s back in high school all of the time and that a 4:45 to begin a long run is probably the smartest thing i can do. I further explained that it must have been that banana which caused the upper respiratory problems that caused my breathing to go out of whack. well, needless to say he suggested that since this is week 1, i take it easy and put it off til next week. I agreed.
So after i got home, i did my normal pre-run routine (PM). I drank 2 ounces of gatorade and immediately went to the bathroom (pee for 15 seconds.. if its not finished, too bad. the formula must be followed otherwise the workout will fail). Ten minutes later, i cut an apple into thirds and sprinkled 2 table spoons of salt on it. I took two bites and then peed for 15 seconds more. Finally, i drank 4 more ounces of gatorade, finished the pee (10 seconds remaining) and was ready to put on my shoes. In case you are wondering why i time my peeing sessions, it stems from Mr. Jack Daniels one of the greatest coaches of our time. he said we should time stuff rather than measure it. So that is what i do.
Tempo Run
I began the first quarter mile of the run at an easy clip of 5:40.. i shook out my legs and then hit the main street where i normally run. There was a little snow on the ground but it is ok today. I noticed there are more cars on the road which pisses me off. The village knows that i train at this time every single day. If they respected the United States, they would block the streets for me. But anyways, i hit mile one at 5:32. You know, SLOW! The next two miles were solid as i was able to hit them at 5:29 and 5:28. At this point i felt a burning sensation in my left toe. Typically this indicates a thunderstorm. But with no rain cloud in sight.. i knew i was in the clear. I ran the fourth mile in 5:28 and was at that clip until the final 1/4 mile of the run. I hit the sidewalk and was close to home when an F%**ing walker got in my way. I yelled "TRACK" "TRACK" a thousand times and the idiot just stood there watching. I asked them what the hell they were thinking just walking down the sidewalk. The guy said he was going for a walk. I told him about when i train and he said he was unaware. I further explained that when a fast runner yells "TRACK" the SLOW person is to get the HELL out of THEIR way. He said that the system was fair and that the next time he saw me he was going to pull out a gun and yell "ASSHOLE" and give me fifteen seconds to get out of his way. What a sense of humor! I am glad we got to an understanding. Anyways i finished the run at 27:12 for five miles. Given the training i have been doing this is acceptable. Albeit VERY SLOW.. i will take it when considering the asshole who got in my way and prevented me from finishing. Go back to slow school slowy.
Well, i must go to bed as i am going to wake up early tomorrow to get a good training in. I picked up my Boston Marathon jacket from the drycleaners earlier so i look forward to wearing it. I usually have it dry cleaned twice a week. Peace out hommeys.
Anyways, after work i decided to call my old track coach Mike Smith and get his thoughts on my morning run.. He said that maybe i went too aggressive in the first mile. What a kidder, he is always so funny! I told him that i ran in the low 4:20s back in high school all of the time and that a 4:45 to begin a long run is probably the smartest thing i can do. I further explained that it must have been that banana which caused the upper respiratory problems that caused my breathing to go out of whack. well, needless to say he suggested that since this is week 1, i take it easy and put it off til next week. I agreed.
So after i got home, i did my normal pre-run routine (PM). I drank 2 ounces of gatorade and immediately went to the bathroom (pee for 15 seconds.. if its not finished, too bad. the formula must be followed otherwise the workout will fail). Ten minutes later, i cut an apple into thirds and sprinkled 2 table spoons of salt on it. I took two bites and then peed for 15 seconds more. Finally, i drank 4 more ounces of gatorade, finished the pee (10 seconds remaining) and was ready to put on my shoes. In case you are wondering why i time my peeing sessions, it stems from Mr. Jack Daniels one of the greatest coaches of our time. he said we should time stuff rather than measure it. So that is what i do.
Tempo Run
I began the first quarter mile of the run at an easy clip of 5:40.. i shook out my legs and then hit the main street where i normally run. There was a little snow on the ground but it is ok today. I noticed there are more cars on the road which pisses me off. The village knows that i train at this time every single day. If they respected the United States, they would block the streets for me. But anyways, i hit mile one at 5:32. You know, SLOW! The next two miles were solid as i was able to hit them at 5:29 and 5:28. At this point i felt a burning sensation in my left toe. Typically this indicates a thunderstorm. But with no rain cloud in sight.. i knew i was in the clear. I ran the fourth mile in 5:28 and was at that clip until the final 1/4 mile of the run. I hit the sidewalk and was close to home when an F%**ing walker got in my way. I yelled "TRACK" "TRACK" a thousand times and the idiot just stood there watching. I asked them what the hell they were thinking just walking down the sidewalk. The guy said he was going for a walk. I told him about when i train and he said he was unaware. I further explained that when a fast runner yells "TRACK" the SLOW person is to get the HELL out of THEIR way. He said that the system was fair and that the next time he saw me he was going to pull out a gun and yell "ASSHOLE" and give me fifteen seconds to get out of his way. What a sense of humor! I am glad we got to an understanding. Anyways i finished the run at 27:12 for five miles. Given the training i have been doing this is acceptable. Albeit VERY SLOW.. i will take it when considering the asshole who got in my way and prevented me from finishing. Go back to slow school slowy.
Well, i must go to bed as i am going to wake up early tomorrow to get a good training in. I picked up my Boston Marathon jacket from the drycleaners earlier so i look forward to wearing it. I usually have it dry cleaned twice a week. Peace out hommeys.
The Long Run
Well today i set out for the first long run of this training period. It kind of reminds me of the time when i was in college at Jacksonville McKneese State Technical University Junior College of Mobile, AL. I was the best runner they had and i still e-mail my coach, Mike Smith, to this day with all my running times. He must be impressed because his last reply was "good for you." Sometimes i make the drive back to cheer on the ole team, and although they don't show, i know that they remember me. It must be because of my speed and talent! It drives jealousy throughout them and they are unable to deal with it.... I made an offer to the new coach that I could come out to one of their practices and speak to the team about 1) Dealing with the pressures of being fast 2) being humble about it; and 3) how to deal with slow people. After all, if you aren't humble with slow people they get all mad and stuff! And then who is going to give you water during a race?
well anyways, today is the first long run i scheduled and it was for 26.2 miles with a goal time of 2:30. I know, I know... i need to step up my game and not set such a slow and easy goal time, but you know, its day two and i am just trying to get the "rust out" as we say. Here are the splits from my run:
Mile 1: 4:45
Mile 2: 7:12
Mile 3: 8:30
Mile 4: 9:00
Mile 5: 9:15
Mile 6: 7:00
Mile 7: 10:00
Mile 8: 11:00
Mile 9: 15:00
Mile 10: 16:33
When I set out for a run this morning, i never figured that it would be this cold and there would be snow on the ground. You see when i normally run at a 4:45 clip, it is sunny and there is no snow on the ground which prevents fast people from running fast. There also was a lot of headwind and hills and you gotta take that into account. I started off conservative with a 4:45.. I was feeling good, but then after the first mile i got a huge cramp. By the time the second mile was through at a 7:12 clip... the cramp got worse and must have hurt my upper respiratory because i seemed to have been breathing pretty hard. I ate a banana two days ago and i think my body was hurting because it was still in my system. You see, you have to get fueled up properly if you wanna run fast. Normally i would have killed this run in under 2:30 as that is an easy time and if you can't hit 2:30 then you pretty much suck as a runner. I knew this girl, i think her name was Kara, and she ran like a 2:34 or something. She was so happy about it (loser)... i told her "listen, if you want to take running seriously, you are gonna have to drop like 50 pounds and maybe train with men." She walked away so i think she went to adhere to my advice.... Later that year she ended up winning this little Rock'N'Roll Race in Chicago in like 1:09 which is an ok time... but good for her.
Anyways, i think i'll hit my 26.2 tonight. This morning served as a good 10-mile recovery run.
well anyways, today is the first long run i scheduled and it was for 26.2 miles with a goal time of 2:30. I know, I know... i need to step up my game and not set such a slow and easy goal time, but you know, its day two and i am just trying to get the "rust out" as we say. Here are the splits from my run:
Mile 1: 4:45
Mile 2: 7:12
Mile 3: 8:30
Mile 4: 9:00
Mile 5: 9:15
Mile 6: 7:00
Mile 7: 10:00
Mile 8: 11:00
Mile 9: 15:00
Mile 10: 16:33
When I set out for a run this morning, i never figured that it would be this cold and there would be snow on the ground. You see when i normally run at a 4:45 clip, it is sunny and there is no snow on the ground which prevents fast people from running fast. There also was a lot of headwind and hills and you gotta take that into account. I started off conservative with a 4:45.. I was feeling good, but then after the first mile i got a huge cramp. By the time the second mile was through at a 7:12 clip... the cramp got worse and must have hurt my upper respiratory because i seemed to have been breathing pretty hard. I ate a banana two days ago and i think my body was hurting because it was still in my system. You see, you have to get fueled up properly if you wanna run fast. Normally i would have killed this run in under 2:30 as that is an easy time and if you can't hit 2:30 then you pretty much suck as a runner. I knew this girl, i think her name was Kara, and she ran like a 2:34 or something. She was so happy about it (loser)... i told her "listen, if you want to take running seriously, you are gonna have to drop like 50 pounds and maybe train with men." She walked away so i think she went to adhere to my advice.... Later that year she ended up winning this little Rock'N'Roll Race in Chicago in like 1:09 which is an ok time... but good for her.
Anyways, i think i'll hit my 26.2 tonight. This morning served as a good 10-mile recovery run.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Day One: Training
Today is the first day of my training to become an Olympian. I always love the first day of a new training session. I think its because of all the potential that is built up. You see, i have always been the fastest runner i know. Although people don't always say it, i know its what they're thinking... I mean sometimes its tough when you are at a race and you run like way faster than everyone. And then they EXPECT YOU to like cheer them on and stuff. I get that like slow people run too, but i am like too tired to cheer them on. And besides, I have my cooldown to take care of..... And its not like they need the cheering on, slow people run slower than me because they don't try hard. they dont face the type of pain i face you know? well anyways, i digress... Here is my workout:
The Warm-up
It was a very cold day today so i decided to run on a treadmill. I got up on the treadmill and all of these slow people were on the good ones. i asked one of them to switch to a different mill because they were using my favorite one. The person looked at me like i was crazy... i looked at his treadmill and saw he was only going 8.0 mph. what a joke... that type of slowness is not even good enough for a handshake from me... I asked the gym manager if there was anything he could do and he said no. Well, after twenty minutes the guy finally left the treadmill so i FINALLY got to use it. I started off at a very slow pace of around 9.0 mph. i just wanted to shake the rust out of my legs.... For all you followers out there, 9.0 mph equals SLOW! I think its like a 6:39 pace or something. Well anyways, i ran for about 1.50 miles and was ready to move on.
The Work-out
I then moved the treadmill to 12.0 mph (5:00 clip) at an incline grade of 6.7%. I wasn't trying to run hard but you know, i needed to have a good run to start the training. Well i hit this pace for about two minutes and started to get cramps. I paused the machine and then fell to the ground in pain. I think it was the bagel i ate earlier today. Anyways, i reset the thing back to 9.0 mph and decided to run three more miles. After all, i know i can hit 5:00 pace easy. I used to run like 4:00 miles in my sleep so this was a joke. But it was day one so i'll make up for it later.
The cool down
I decided to do my cool down at 9.1 mph. I ran for about 2 miles and started to get a crowd. this really cute girl (who also was SLOW, hahaha) started looking at me while i ran. She just STOOD there looking at me. Anyways, i finally jumped off the tread after two miles and told her that it was cool for her to talk to me. she must have been really impressed because her jaw dropped and she didn't say a word. She then walked to the treadmill i was at and picked up an i-pod. The gym must have been giving them away or something. Well i walked with her on the way to the locker room and introduced myself. She must have been shy because she told me to get the fuck out of her face. Hahaha.... the slow ones are so shy. She totally wants me. .
Total miles: 6.25
The Warm-up
It was a very cold day today so i decided to run on a treadmill. I got up on the treadmill and all of these slow people were on the good ones. i asked one of them to switch to a different mill because they were using my favorite one. The person looked at me like i was crazy... i looked at his treadmill and saw he was only going 8.0 mph. what a joke... that type of slowness is not even good enough for a handshake from me... I asked the gym manager if there was anything he could do and he said no. Well, after twenty minutes the guy finally left the treadmill so i FINALLY got to use it. I started off at a very slow pace of around 9.0 mph. i just wanted to shake the rust out of my legs.... For all you followers out there, 9.0 mph equals SLOW! I think its like a 6:39 pace or something. Well anyways, i ran for about 1.50 miles and was ready to move on.
The Work-out
I then moved the treadmill to 12.0 mph (5:00 clip) at an incline grade of 6.7%. I wasn't trying to run hard but you know, i needed to have a good run to start the training. Well i hit this pace for about two minutes and started to get cramps. I paused the machine and then fell to the ground in pain. I think it was the bagel i ate earlier today. Anyways, i reset the thing back to 9.0 mph and decided to run three more miles. After all, i know i can hit 5:00 pace easy. I used to run like 4:00 miles in my sleep so this was a joke. But it was day one so i'll make up for it later.
The cool down
I decided to do my cool down at 9.1 mph. I ran for about 2 miles and started to get a crowd. this really cute girl (who also was SLOW, hahaha) started looking at me while i ran. She just STOOD there looking at me. Anyways, i finally jumped off the tread after two miles and told her that it was cool for her to talk to me. she must have been really impressed because her jaw dropped and she didn't say a word. She then walked to the treadmill i was at and picked up an i-pod. The gym must have been giving them away or something. Well i walked with her on the way to the locker room and introduced myself. She must have been shy because she told me to get the fuck out of her face. Hahaha.... the slow ones are so shy. She totally wants me. .
Total miles: 6.25
The introduction - Fast Man
I have always been fast. Ever since I can remember, i was always just faster than everybody else. My earliest running memory occurred when I was 8 years old. I went to the store with my mom and her new boyfriend at the time. We went to Toys'R'Us I believe... i begged them to take me all week long and finally they decided to bring me because i did a chore or something. Well, we left on a saturday and i was very excited. I ran into the store and looked for the newest Nintendo game i could find which was Rush'N'Attack. I quickly grabbed the ticket for the game (which is what they did back then) and ran to find my mom and her boyfriend, Hector. Well i ran all over the store and could not find them. I asked store security and they brought me in the office. After three hours, they gave up on looking for my guardians and told me to go home. One of the security guards was very nice. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cares. well anyways, i decided to run home. I had never run before so it was a new kind of pain. The first mile hurt a bit, but i was still able to hold an 8:30 clip. The following quarter mile picked up a bit as i felt these new pains and emotions i had never felt before... i believe it was around a 1:35 or 1:36. Well, then i totally bonked and the next mile was run at a 8:46 clip. Well since i had never run that far before, i slowed it down to a clip of around 8:49 for the final mile and i was home. When i had walked in the door, Hector said "It took you long enough! What did you do cry?". i asked him why they left me at the store.. he said that they had set the vcr to tape "Murder She Wrote" but forgot that my first recital was the tape in the vcr so they headed home to try to salvage some of the memory. That was totally cool. Hector is such a cool dude. From this day forward, i became a runner.
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