Well i used that energy to continue this Olympic dream. You know the routine. Four gel packs as soon as wake up followed by a quick 5-mile 1x1x0.50x3800xAx30x40 work-out. Took it out at a Z2 and then finished at a Z6 but didn't waste my nut on a Z7. its like keeping a steady age grade at 91% but not above 97%. You gotta save yourself for the races, you know. Still, I am not a SLOW guy so you can't go EASY. I feel that is what's wrong with SLOW runners... they are always running easy. They are always running in groups and laughing with each other and looking like they are having fun. Running is not fun. Running is not for friendships and groups. Running means a lot of pain and sacrifices and finally showing Ryan Hall that he is a SLOW pussy and that he should have given me that autograph when i saw him at Chuck E. Cheeze rather than walk away from me. I keep that memory with me for every long run, every tempo run... I will show him! I must show him!
Anyways, I decided to buy a new watch because when i woke up - mine wasn't working. It started when the screen looked a bit faded. I typically use one of those cheap GPS watches that you find at a Walgreen's for $9.99. You know, the kind that measure your mileage and pace but don't specifically display that information forcing you to press the lap button when you feel you come across a mile. So i really invested into this nice Speedo Watch which should do the trick. It is made for lap swimmers... While they are SLOW, they still are an underappreciated group who really loves measuring distances and times and stuff. See the picture below and make sure to put a napkin on your keyboard as you will drool all over it like a teenager attending the boner fest they call 90210.. wait, is that show still on tv anymore? I was always a Brenda Fan.
For my afternoon run, i decided to test my new watch on the track. I like to use the local track at my high school down the street. It has 8 lanes and is the color red for veangeance. Today is my favourite workout, Repeat Miles. I went to the track at 3:00 PM so those mean school kids weren't there to say disparaging remarks about how good looking I am and how sexy my legs are when i train in my marathong. Normally i would wear the 3 inch Saucony shorts, but it was feeling a little warmer this day, and i really wanted my legs to be free so i could run faster.
I stepped to the line and went. BOOM! I took off like a rocket... I didn't look at the watch but i could tell i was going really fast. Now, you know i have run sub-3:00 miles before so i was pretty pumped. Finished the first lap and felt great so i threw on a big Serj. Getting faster and rounding the corner.. When all of a sudden, i felt the air coming out of my lungs before completing lap 2. That is crazy, my lungs don't fail 2/3 into a mile. It obviously can't be me, because i am in phenomenal shape.. Oh, those dickhead throwers didn't cover up the fences surrounding the track. I watch the weather channel and it is true that wind carries much faster on Tuesday Afternoons when you are running on a track in a valley. THat is why high schools don't have meets on Tuesdays. You have to optimize performance.
Finally, i hit my third and final lap of the mile and stopped the watch. A fricking 3:10. There must be something wrong with this track. It took me 3 minutes and 10 seconds just to run a FRICKING Mile. What the hell is wrong with me? Am I old?
And then it hit me. The stupid wind. I decided to run a 10 mile cool down and think about my failure to break 3:00 for the mile. Right when it seemed everything was going my way... This sucks. I feel like an Australian in the Olympics... I guess tomorrow I will have to be better. I must be better. Otherwise, if i am not better... Ryan Hall wins. And worse than that, he will beat me because i am too effing SLOW! And then he'll probably tell me that I did a good job and that he'll pray for me or something stupid like that. UGH...... Maybe its the fucking watch.
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